Friday, December 26, 2008

A thought on Motherhood

"I cannot forget my mother.
She is my bridge.
When I needed to get
across, she steadied herself
long enough for me
to run across safely."


I don’t know who wrote this quote but it has become significant to me. Our children need countless bridges throughout their lives. It is up to us, as parents, to be that bridge for we alone have the commitment, insight, and strength needed by our individual children. Unfortunately, far too many mothers refuse to be a bridge. Being a bridge is not easy; have you ever tried to physically be a bridge for someone? The effort is the same to be a “bridge mother”, though mothers do not only play the role of a physical bridge (pregnancy, childbirth, etc.) but also mental, emotional, and spiritual bridges. Though some women honestly do not know the desperate need for or how to be a bridge mother, sadly, many other women choose not to be a bridge mother.

"The commonest fallacy among women
is that simply having children makes them a mother –
which is as absurd as believing that having a piano
makes one a musician."


Most all of what we do as mothers is being a bridge for our children. Pregnancy and childbirth are the first bridges. They are not easy in any way. Perhaps we should see this time as training for motherhood, for to be the mother our children need, that “suffering”, that marathon effort and patience must never end.

Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. We are career warriors. Our battles are no less difficult than those fought on the battlefield, and we fight these battles for a lifetime. I think that you may think that this sounds somewhat cliché… but if you doubt the truth of this, try daily to make a hundred times the choice to do what is best for your children instead of what would be comfortable or even best for yourself. You will quickly find that one’s own self-focus and self-righteousness, self-indulgence and laziness, fear and insecurities, discomfort and pain are some of the most wearisome, relentless and powerful foes ever faced on earth. Attempt to die tiny deaths dozens of times a day, every day, every month, every year for decades and you will not suppose to call motherhood insignificant or dishonorable or second-rate.
I hope that more women will choose to seize the strength God has given them (He offers all the needed strength to every woman) and begin a new legacy of mothering in their own families.
As my mother did for me,
I will steady myself and be a
Bridge Mother.
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“She has a more influential and powerful role than any political, military, religious or educational figure. Her words are never fully forgotten. For good or for ill, a mother’s impact is permanent. A child’s mother is arguably the most influential figure in his or her life, giving credence to the old adage: the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.”
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"Mother—in this consists the glory and
the most precious ornament of woman."
-Martin Luther.
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"I cannot name myself as one
Who never goes astray,
Who never stumbles on the road,
Or leaves the hallowed way.
But when I know that baby feet
Will follow where I’ve trod,
I walk with care that they too may walk
That road that leads to God."
-Margaret Fishback Powers
-----------------------
"The Sweetest sounds to mortals given are heard in
Mother, Home, and Heaven."
-W.G. Brown

-----------------------
Motherhood
The bravest battle that ever was fought!
Shall I tell you where and when?
On the maps of the world you will find it not;
'Twas fought by the mothers of men.

Nay not with the cannon of battle-shot,
With a sword or noble pen;
Nay, not with eloquent words or thought
From mouth of wonderful men!

But deep in a walled-up woman's heart -
Of a woman that would not yield,
But bravely, silently bore her part -
Lo, there is the battlefield!

No marshalling troops, no bivouac song,
No banner to gleam and wave;
But oh! those battles, they last so long -
From babyhood to the grave.

Yet, faithful still as a bridge of stars,
She fights in her walled-up town -
Fights on and on in her endless wars,
Then silent, unseen, goes down.

Oh, ye with banners and battle-shot,
And soldiers to shout and praise!
I tell you the kingliest victories fought
Were fought in those silent ways.

O spotless woman in a world of shame,
With splendid and silent scorn,
Go back to God as white as you came -
The Kingliest warrior born!

- Joaquin Miller (1839-1913)

3 comments:

Tim and Holly said...

Inspiring!

DARALYN said...

I am surprized to say that being an empty nester did not retire me from motherhood. It is still physically, emotionally, and spiritually tough. And I am promising to commit my strength to the end.

~Mom

Anonymous said...

Your Mom is right.

My nest isn't quite empty, but the four flying on their own still require the stability of this bridge. I am promising as well to commit my strength to the end.

Our mom was a bridge as well; the first of her family in many generations who found a way to build a little stability for her children in this crazy world. It made our stretch to secure both sides possible when it didn't happen for so many of our cousins on her side; enabled us to be willing and able to make that commitment.